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Showing posts from August, 2010

Technical Humour

Apart from releasing a high quality software product, our team has various other talents. Amongst those, there is one that just cannot be overlooked. If some of my team mates are reading this, they would probably know what I am talking about. Yes, it is the ability to crack pathetic jokes about anything and everything on the surface of this earth.   Over the last 7 years, I remember two "technical jokes" that deserve a special mention. If you know more, please feel free to add. Technical Joke #1 (Joke Creator: Saurabh Gupta, Audience: Me, Comic Creator: Me) Technical Joke/Puzzle #2 (Joke Creator: VJ, Audience: Whoever he could catch) There was a group of 30 people and a tray of 30 sweets. The first member of the group said "Lo or aage pass kar do." So the tray went around the room and when it reached the last member, it still had 30 sweets in it. Why? . . . . . Try harder!! . . . . . because the instruction was "Lo  OR aage pass kar do&q

A Tiny Voice

(Wrote this about four years back. But has remained my favorite till now.) Vinay was a sound sleeper. He usually slept late in the night and, as a result, woke up late. Very few things could disturb his sleep. He barely stirred when there was an earthquake. He would not budge if clouds thundered themselves away. He would not even wake up if his cell phone shrieked right next to his ears. Things looked the same that night too, when after a wild evening at the local pub, Vinay came back home and slumped down on his bed. He fell asleep right away and started dreaming almost immediately. He dreamt that he was back in the pub surrounded by beautiful girls and having the time of his life drinking and flirting. This was his favorite type of dream and he was thoroughly enjoying himself when something very unusual happened. He woke up! Surprised, Vinay looked around for the source of this nearly impossible interruption in his sleep. A very low but continuous static could be heard. He t

Anxiety, thy name is Tiger/Lion

(Photo clicked by my friend, Sachin Jain) I am not afraid of Tigers and Lions. I love watching them hunt on National Geographic or Discovery and am not repulsed by the way they devour their hapless victims. I do not jump out of my skin when I see their pictures. They are the animals that I find most interesting when I visit the zoo. And while on a Safari, I keep my fingers crossed for a sighting. I am not intimidated by them provided they maintain their distance.  People claim to have recurring dreams or nightmares. I do too. I dream a lot about Lions and Tigers. They do not attack. That could be quick and clean. Instead they stalk. The general pattern of these dreams is that there is a village or a town where these tigers or lions or sometimes both, are roaming around. I am trying to get somewhere while avoiding these predators who, by the way, seem to sense that I am trying to do just that. On my way, I take shelter in various houses and many times narrowly escape being spotted by

A Post Office with a Difference!

On Saturday, I had to deal with India's Snail Mail System after ages. I do not remember when I last received a speed post. Yet I received one on the 27th and that too at my Indirapuram flat which is currently unoccupied. So it was only by chance that my friend went up to the house to show it to some potential buyers and he discovered a note stuck on the bolt. The note stated that the Ghaziabad Post Office had received a Speed Post in my name and I would need to collect it from the Shipra Sun City Post Office the next day from 9:00 AM to 10:00AM. My friend went to the post office to collect the letter but the post office did not hand it over to him. They insisted that someone from the Malhotra family would need to collect it. Everything about a Speed Post suggests that it is important. They are mostly used by government agencies as they are considered safer. And the term Speed Post also carries with itself the connotations of urgency.  And an urgent letter from the Government is